As I sit here I think to myself what exactly do I want my blog page to be about! Should I be raw and candid and really put my thoughts to writing or should I be more cautious and not really bring out the real me. I think I prefer the latter of the two, so I hope I do not offend anyone who may read this or come across my page.
My perception, my eyes... all about what has molded and shaped who I am as a woman. Life wasn't easy growing up in a single parent household, never having met my father and feeling like I wasn't worth anything to him. But the then to have my mother trying to find her own little bit of happiness and having to be placed in the horrible situation that we'll call Walter, really screwed me up more. We'll get into some stories on Walter later but for now, we'll stick to small pieces and not dive into full details. Needless to say, Walter subjected me to child abuse, domestic violence, drugs and alcohol and an array of settings a child should never become involved with. We ended up not having anything. I knew what standing in line outside of a warehouse for powdered milk and government cheese meant, hitting up numerous food banks, receiving free shoe's from my elementary school and walking to the store with a booklet of food stamps in my hands. My mother made a decision to return back to school and began pulling us out of the slums of Fruit Valley. I knew I wanted to change my personal life and surroundings and promised myself I would always be the best at what I do, so there I was a nearly straight A student. My only downfall was I was pregnant at sixteen years old and by the time I hit my juinor year of high school I was a mother. My senior year of high school my mother had an unexpected asthma attack which lead to cardiac arrest and she passed. Since a month after my eighteenth birthday I have lived on my own, with the exception of my marriage and another man that I thought I was going to marry. I have been disowned by my family essentially because I had children out of wedlock, been perceived as a failure and have worked through the horrible abandonment issues I carried around with me for twentyeight years of my life. I have walked a path and because of that it has shaped and molded me into the woman, mother, graddaughter, sister, friend and associate that I am today.
I have numerous things to share, all from my perspective and point of view. You may agree, disagree, feel connected to my stories or opinions but please know that in my writing none of this will be intended to offend or hurt any particular person. I am raw, as my grandma tells me, "I tell it like it is," and being that this is my blog page... I will say what I want!
I hope you enjoy my posts!
